Shirley Sogah Advocates for Grandparents

In 1989, two-year-old Ron was taken from his mother and put into protective custody. Shirley Sogah, his grandmother, was told by the social service agency that she had no visitation or custody rights. Refusing to accept this dictate, Sogah began a painful and arduous journey that led not only to the successful adoption of her two grandsons, but also to her founding the Denver-based Grandparents Resource Center (GRC).

The American Association of Retired Persons (AARP) calls the Grandparents Resource Center "the most progressive grassroots organization in the United States," but the road to success was littered with obstacles and challenges. While her grandchild was being shuffled around within the foster care system, Sogah focussed on educating herself about grandparents' rights. Having gone back to school, she wrote her thesis on "Grandparenting in the '90s." The research contained in Sogah's thesis provided the impetus to fast-track Colorado legislation protecting the rights of grandparents, which was enacted in 1991.

Saying, "I was probably the most disliked grandmother in Colorado when I started," Sogah has since become a friend of the social services and court systems, and a staunch advocate for grandparents worldwide. Not only does she counsel grandparents throughout the U.S., but she has also consulted with social workers and hospital administrators from New Zealand to China.

Sogah is walking the talk of family values, instilled in her by her parents, for whom "Family was the most important thing." While some people would resolve their personal plight and move on with their lives, Sogah felt she had to do more. "I didn't want others to experience the pain that my family went through," she reveals. Thus, after receiving her degree, she went on to gain certification as a paralegal, and in 1994, quit her job to volunteer full-time with the organization she founded.

The GRC, which Sogah launched with an inheritance from her father and which relies exclusively on donations, offers a myriad of programs and services, including those for grandparents seeking custody; grandparents raising teen moms; grandparent parenting classes; and counseling for parents without custody.

Sogah, whose love for Ron, 12, and Jeremy, 8, is palpable, says that both boys understand and support her work. Ron, who "has the sweetest heart you can imagine," is a member of GRC's Board of Directors, and even speaks to the media about why it's important for kids to remain with their families. When he's not in the spotlight, Ron gets a kick out of playing Sega games and working on the computer with his grandfather, Manny. Sogah says that she and Jeremy, who plays Little League, are the "outdoorsy people," and that the family enjoys picnics, fishing, watching videos and playing board games.

Being part of a family is central to Sogah's mission. While she acknowledges that there are many good foster parents, she says, "On the whole, a child belongs with blood relatives. They need to know they're going to be safe. They need to know they have family, that they belong, that they're loved, and that somebody will always be there for them."

Sogah will continue to be there for Ron and Jeremy, as well as other grandparents who need her help. "I think that God molds you, prepares you, and sows the seeds. I don't think I could find the personal peace, satisfaction and joy that I experience with this work anywhere else. I sometimes feel that there's nothing else I can do besides this."